So do what you can, where you are with what you have and never be satisfied.
Anticipation is the ultimate advantage in business and in life.
Like, you’re not 100% sure what could happen if you keep going.
You can do it tomorrow is going to be better.
What do you tell people when they ask you you know, how can I present like you?
How can I get better?
The thing that really really helps is that I’ve learned about the perspective to change my perspective, so for example I show up to give and I always remind people that the most important thing about being an effective presenter, an effective speaker is you have to show up with a giving attitude, you have to show up to give, you know something, you’ve seen something, you’ve done something, you’ve tried something that someone else thinks others need to hear that’s why they invited you to speak.
The problem is the number of people who show up to take, to get and you can see it, it’s very plain to see people ask a question and they say, “You’ll have to buy my book” or you could just tell me the answer because you know the answer because you wrote the book, right! But clearly they’re trying to drive book sales, it’s a taking mentality. Every single slide of their PowerPoint has their Instagram, their email, their website, their Facebook.
Well, clearly they want you to follow them, they want you to reach out the last slide is their website and their email. Right? They have a taking mentality.
They come up and the first thing they do is tell you their credentials “Hi, my name is, you know, Dr. Bla-de-bla I have six PhDs, I’ve worked for 55 companies, I advise CEOs and generals” and let me tell you a little something it’s about them.
It’s very easy and very quick to discern who’s the giver and who’s the taker. The best speakers 100% of them you look at all the top TED folks you know, Sir Ken Robinson, Amy Cuddy, Brene Brown. Right! Dan Pink, all of them.
All of them are there to give. Use Reddit to find methods of better public speaking.
None of them want anything from anybody, not even your approval. No nobody… I don’t know any great speaker that stands in the backstage that goes “I’m going to get a standing ovation” you may get one if you earn it. if they decide that what you’ve given them is of value that’s not the reason you show up, you show up to give.
How many of you guys experience fear when you speak? How many of you by a show of hands know that public speaking is fundamental to your industry, your career? By show of hands how?
How many of you by show of hands honestly speaking experience a little bit of fear when we talk about public speaking?
Raise your hand and over the last three years, I’ve had the opportunity to travel the country and deliver presentations like this and what I’ve picked up on is that there are certain patterns, there are certain patterns and certain skill sets that if applied can make a public speech amazing.
If you follow these principles that we’re going to talk about today I think I don’t care what industry you’re part of, I don’t care what work you’re in, I don’t care what year you are, I don’t care how old you are I believe if you apply these principles today you can literally transform where you are and take the journey to where you want to be. Straightforward, I believe there’s three principles.
Three A’s of public speaking.
Three things that I wanted to leave you with today and I believe if you take action on it you’re going to be like, “Oh my god, I’m glad I came.”
Number 1: Authenticity engages.
November 2017, I was afforded the opportunity to give my first TEDx talk and man, can I tell you I was excited. You got to imagine, a young professional starting out ready 26 years old and I want to make this very clear so I’m thinking to myself and what I used to do is when I prepare I would give a talk at least 100 times before I give it. Write that down. I give it mentally, I give it out, I talk to people conversationally, in the shower, I’m like, “Okay, this is okay. I’m going to do this, right?” And I think to myself PowerPoint or no PowerPoint that’s all I’m thinking.
I’m like, “Okay, if I give this presentation should I, should I use the PowerPoint behind me or should I just use me instead of using the PowerPoint. So I’m- I’m researching and I’m watching I’ve watched more TED Talks than you could possibly imagine and I’m like, “Okay, they do this, they do that.” Okay, I’ve seen good ones with the PowerPoint, I’ve seen good ones without and what I notice is, I said, “You know what, I’m going to ask my closest friends and family I’m going to take a poll. 12 people that I love, that know me well.
I said, “Sister, should I use a PowerPoint?” she goes, “Yeah, something to back you up, use a PowerPoint.” I go “Mom, should I use a PowerPoint?” She says, “No PowerPoint, use you.” I say “Bro, should I use a PowerPoint?” He goes, “Yeah, you need the stats to back up what you’ve done.” I said cool. I go through the entire list six – six I put the list down and I go, what was I thinking with an even number. I’m getting ready for the biggest speech of my professional life. Right? And professionals, people that I love are telling me no PowerPoint – PowerPoint and it’s six – six and I’m like how am I going to break this tie? And I’m like wait I didn’t ask one person I didn’t ask myself I did not ask myself what I would be most comfortable with to present.
When we talk about public speaking and why I say authenticity engages listen to me here you have to know yourself before you go and seek advice. You have to speak from the gut before you go and ask because when you’re talking to an audience, an audience can feel realness and you have to be yourself. If you can’t be yourself you will never engage in the way in which you want to that I have to listen to me first in order to really deliver a message that informs and inspires.
Number 2: Awareness
Awareness connects the speaker to the audience and this is what I mean. And so one of the speaking events comes- comes about and… I get the opportunity to- to speak in- in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. And before the event you know, you want to be early, you want to be ready, know your audience, know your crowd I hear like all this partying type thing going on and I’m like, what’s going on? And I go down and they have… they have an open bar and they had the open bar for hours they were lit guys, they were lit. Right?
And so listen, I go to the event I’m in my mind, I’m thinking it’s going to be a professional motivational this is what you need to do and I walk into a party and so as a speaker I’m thinking, “Oh my goodness” like I was prepared to do one thing, I flew all the way here and there’s literally a party in the audience like… the wave, the energy is like, Hey, I hope this guy’s cool I hope he’s going to, you know, have a joke and I’m like… that’s not the content that I deliver so I get up they call me up and I walk up just like this and they’re as quiet as you guys are.
They’re literally staring at me like, what’s this guy about? Right? And at that moment, I decided right before I got up I said you know what, I’m going to tell a story and I said before I begin I just want let you guys know I’m… I’m coming from Sacramento and I hopped on the plane and I met an individual and we were chatting it up and he thought I was going to give a presentation in Colorado and I told him, “No, I’m actually giving a presentation in Sioux Falls” and the look on his face was blank and he said, “Excuse me, where?” and I said, “Sioux Falls” then he said these three words and I’ll never forget it. He said, “Are you sure?” and I said that and there was a man sitting right where you’re sitting. And he literally laughed like he was at a Kevin Hart special. He lost it.
I’m talking chair went back. He’s laughing so hard, it’s about a crowd of 200 that everybody… you guys ever caught this, when somebody laughs so hard that you have to laugh the whole crowd literally just starts busting laughing. And I start laughing from the stage I’m like, man if this is how it’s going to be let’s have a good time. And at that moment I realized something because the old me would have been so stuck on the preparation part that I would have never had the audacity, I would have never had the awareness situational awareness is what I mean.
When you speak or present sometimes things will not go as planned and there’s no way to plan for it. And what you have to do is be fluid and malleable and ready to rock with the situation.
And if you have situational awareness what often can happen is you can play on what is happening I said huh, open bar, alcohol, social event, I’m coming with motivation if I switch it just like this and tell a joke and let them know I’m not all serious up here the audience will be on my side.
Number 3: Audacity
Audacity informs and inspires. You have to be bold in order to give a speech that’s going to last. How many you guys experience fear when you speak? Fear of an opinion of other, fear of being criticized, fear of not being good enough, fear of tripping up on a word, fear of what you look like.
We know that fear drives most of us and I’m here to tell you that audacity is what you need, boldness is what you need. If you want to deliver something and absolutely be transformative I’m passionate about this, I believe this because I live this. I’m telling you, you have to be bold.
You can’t half-step into your presentation you have to be bold you cannot half-step into your presentation and one of the ways in which we do that is we deliver a story. Story includes power. Stories are powerful, they’re the most powerful thing that you can do when you open your mouth because the brain operates in pictures and a story has the ability to paint the picture in the mind of another individual.
They did a study about TED Talks, in the top TED Talks I’m talking the million, the million hits. The top TED Talks, 85% of them were story centric. Stories can be crossed over to any industry at any time whether you’re telling your personal story, whether it’s Martin Luther King delivering a speech, whether it’s a president of a country. A story is the thing that allows- has time sit and let’s you go like this Huh. A story is powerful right?
Never tell a story without making a point but never make a point without telling a story.
Use the story to drive home what you’re trying to do. It crosses every industry, every… anything that you want to do a story will get you there.